Thursday, July 17, 2014

Illustrious Order

Don't expect Bil Underdown to shake your hand or anything.  
You either are or you aren't.
"Are you made of metal or marshmallow fluff?" he wants to know.
You know he's looking at you.

Thunderdown represents the first of a trio of trials that earn an intrepid rider a position in the Order of Bill Underdown. To enter the ranks the following must be completed at this month's events, a comprehensive test of the aspirants gumption in the fields of single-track, gravel and feasting:

  1. Complete 30 or more miles in the Thunderdown in the Underdown.
  2. Finish Bill Underdown's Roubaix-style Group Ride on July 26th.
  3. Finish the 20-inch Spread Billy Burger* at Fork Horners on the same day.  
Those seeking a challenge that will not thrice push them to the breaking point may find a scaled-down, but still noble quest in the Norbie Challenge:

  1. Complete 20 or more miles at the Thunderdown.
  2. Finish the Fork Horners 47 on July 26th.
  3. Finish the Norbie Burger** on the same day.

*The Billy Burger consists of 3 succulent half-pound beef cakes with bacon and a pound of fries.
** Just a pound of meat.

Induction ceremonies and medallions should not be expected, but rest assured that those who are up to the challenge will forever hold a position of high esteem among their peers.

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